My Sixteenth Blog

Where did I go?

I was so gung-ho about this blog 2 weeks ago and now I’m losing steam. It’s not that I’ve run out of things to write about, in fact, I have a lot of ideas, I just don’t know where to start. I feel like when I started I was dead set on doing my best to not give a shit about what anyone thought about my writing. I write it, I like it, I publish it, it’s done. Somewhere along this short journey I let fear in, and I let it take over.

What if this incredible community of people who have accepted me with open ears decides they no longer deem my writing worthy? What if they start to hate my posts? Every time I post my followers will get an email saying I posted something. Sometimes I get really annoyed when I have 10 emails from the same person in one day. To me that’s just excessive. What if someone feels that way when I post 3 times in one week? I don’t want anyone to feel that way.

I’ve been trying to do a lot of “soul searching” lately because I’m at a crossroads in my life where I honestly have no clue what I want to do with my life. Yes, I want to make it as a writer. I’d love to write for the rest of my life andย survive on that. What if someone reads this and has read the rest of my work and says: “Is this guy serious? There’s no fuckin’ way he’s gonna make it as a writer. His writing is shit.”

We all get self confidence issues, we all have self doubt. I’ve given in to the doubt and it’s stopped me from writing.

Tonight I say no more.

Tonight I say “fuck you” to the doubt–to the fear.

Whether my writing isย good or not it doesn’t matter anymore. I have a voice, and I’m using it, and I’m saying whatever I want to.

I can’t say I’ll write as much as I was before, but I’ll be writing, and that counts for something.

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6 thoughts on “My Sixteenth Blog

  1. Like Dory says: just keep swimming! Blogging is a great way for writers both established and aspiring to find their feet and figure out what they want to write; fiction, non-fiction, auto-biographical. The world is your mollusc!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I think it’s fairly normal for most to lose steam. It in no way means you’re not good enough. Maybe, all you need is a brief hiatus. Get your thoughts together, then hit the ground running. Whatever you decide, you will still have devoted readers; myself being one of them. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I love your writing! Bloggers all get self doubt because we’re putting out content so often…a writer would spend a lot of time honing every piece of writing to perfection. Blogging isn’t about perfection or even accuracy. It’s about sharing yourself authentically and getting into a flow. The greatest enemy to creativity is self doubt. Enjoy the creativity aspect and forget your reader. Sometimes I’ll get double the number of views on a post compared to those that liked it…so what! I focus on the ones that liked it ๐Ÿ˜Š

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I think writing is kind of like filling a balloon with words instead of helium. If you’re lucky, it will float majestically into the sky where people will be inspired by its beauty and journey. If the winds are right, it will float to a far away land where others will be awed and talk about it for years.
    But more likely than not, it will be hit by a flock of birds in mid flight and your words will go tumbling down in a chaotic sequence and the ballon will just make farting noises as it loses air and no one but you will be able to unscramble the words.
    I’m just sayin’.

    Like

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